Day 2 Disaster!

This is not the internal critic speaking. This is a curious soul who is wondering why initial progress in learning is so frequently followed by disaster. In a recent post, I mentioned that after a successful run of a new or difficult juggling pattern, the next several runs are fall apart immediately. I've noticed the same thing with art. From Saturday's class and the start of "a pear a day", I could see something that I wanted to explore or build upon. When I went to paint a pear yesterday morning, let's just say that it did not go well.

11/04/19 - Pear

I think this shows that I had left the place of the beginners mind, where you can stay open and curious, to letting the everyday mind (or at least my everyday mind) start down the path "aha, I think I can do this" or focusing on the result or something like that. I can feel it better than I can explain it, but it's way more autopilot versus being fully present and curious. Of course, disaster ensues. The mind is such a tricky thing. I didn't start out intentional or deliberate. The next time, I am going to try, try, try to set the intention before I begin that I am exploring a process and new medium.

In the meantime since I was working from home, I took a break mid-morning and played on crappy paper with more openness and curiosity.