Self Conscious

I've been feeling a little self-conscious and I've also busy. When I get out of the habit of posting to this blog, drawing, or painting, it can be hard to pick it back up. To get the habit back, this is a "just do it" post.

My hubby got a new bike last week.  It's a step-through bike.We don't have a secure place in the garage, yet, so it's in the living room. Here is a very quick sketch from last week. I wasn't warmed up. I didn't measure. I didn't plan. I just started with the seat and went from there. It might sound like I'm making excuses. I'm not. It was fun to have no expectations. It was interesting making decisions about what to include and what to skip.

I've passed on posting a few things, which is a bad thing to do. That starts me down the self-conscious path. Here are two timed pear paintings. Last week at the co-op, I saw an adorable red bartlett pear. The other timed paintings were limes and I lost my ability to make round objects have depth and volume, so those aren't presented.

#341 - Timed Pear Paintings - 4" x 8" - paper

In the spirit of painting from life, I also did another, non-timed, pear painting. I reached a stopping point on this one and didn't stop. The light bounced back up on the pear on this one and I was pleased that I really saw it and saw that it was a cool, blue-lavender color.

#342 - Co-op Pear - 6" x 6"

Last week, I also had fun drawing a peony flower that I placed in my little vase. I didn't have the patience or time to do the entire flower, since there is a lot of detail! Instead, I really enjoyed doing the outline and adding some of the inside shapes for volume.  It was almost hypnotizing looking and drawing the shapes of  the larger outside petals. Here's my favorite. The vase is wonky, but  the flower reads to me.

My Eyes

As much as I grouse about how poorly I see, I am feeling vastly superior to my camera phone this morning. I have been working on drawing a single iris flower last night and this morning. I remembered a small, handmade vase I can use to prop up a single large flower or several smaller flowers. Mostly, I just enjoy flowers out in my yard, due to El Destructo 1 (Chandler) and El Destructo 2 (Hammett).

The bearded irises in my yard are past their peak. I thought I would try to paint them this year, but was too busy cleaning up the gardens, an ongoing project. Rather than completely missing the opportunity, I brought one in last night to draw. I also drew it this morning before I started to work from home.

My camera phone simply cannot capture the depth and richness of the color. I tried with several different backgrounds in the house. Earlier in the week, I also have tried taking pictures of them in the yard at different times of the day. These irises are that deep, rich purple, which is a true purple but is more closely related to cobalt blue than the camera can pick up. Cobalt blue seems like it would be a third cousin to the color in the picture, but in life it's more of a first cousin. The phone sees the color with too much red in it. Also what I see in life, the form and structure of the flower has so much more depth, volume, and beauty than the camera captures.

Here's the best, quick picture I could take.

While my drawings were not blind contour, I consciously tried to look much, much more at the flower than at my paper. This flower made for very good practice, since there are a lot of edges which curl back onto themselves. I find this to be a particular challenge to process and draw correctly. This morning, I also tried to draw smaller. All of these fit onto a 10" x 10" page. Last night, I did a similar number of drawings, but used 3 sheets to do it. For me, it's not so much about burning through paper. I would like to have more control and I feel like I drawing from life in one size, large. I'd like to add medium to the mix.

Last night's and this morning's drawings felt really good. I got out of the word processing side of my brain. It also gave me a boost of self confidence, since my painting has currently plateaued and even taking a step backwards. Yesterday with two timed paintings of a lime, I could not get the lime, a spherical object, to have depth and volume to it.

Wow, Wow, Wow

It’s like the universe said “you, you need the information in this video”. I’ve watched some of Alphonso Dunn’s videos in the past and I think I need to watch more. In this particular video (and the one which precedes it), there was a lot which clicked. The breaking things down and seeing applies to all of it. The directional stuff seems like it would help with paint strokes.

By the way, part of my current non-focus has involved mindlessly scrolling through Facebook. I’m not sure why I am wasting time this way, but it’s sure easy to burn up time once you start! While I ate lunch today, I checked out part 1 and 2 of the drawing fur videos. If I am going to spend time looking at a screen, this is a much better use of time!

Small Victory (Very Small)

Focus. Discipline. What’s that? It certainly has disappeared in my art practice. It’s early June. The weather is gorgeous and I have about 1,000 things I would like to do. My painting has been spotty, which is a problem. It’s too easy to start to make excuses and skip days when the habit wanes. It also is an open invitation to the internal critic. On the drawing front, it's a little better. I am sketching at home in little pockets of time here and here.

Meet my favorite model. While I adore my other two cats, if I find myself wanting to pick up a pen, it’s almost always because of Hammett. There has always been an ease about him in the way he moves, sleeps, and poses.

This morning he was bathing on top of a small perch, so there was a lot of movement. I tend to freeze up or go for too much details or in truth not even try to draw in this type of situation. Instead of getting all hung up on what I don't know how to do, I spent 10 minutes just trying to capture part of the cat or the feel of a quick pose without worrying about accuracy, detail, or any of that. That felt like a small victory. This is the one I liked best. Since I drew on the back of the page, ignore the lines which show through.

New Background

My most recent painting did not turn out. Instead, here's my last one with a new background. I also played around with some of the details.

Yesterday, I also practiced making brush strokes just for the heck of it. There's nothing to see from that, but it was a lot of fun.

The End Of An Era

Good bye, sweet bike.

My 18-speed touring bike, which I have owned and enjoyed for the past 30 years, is in this weekend's used bike sale at The Hub Bike Co-op. I think of this bike as a friend. It''s still a good bike and I hope someone buys it who will enjoy it as much as I have. While it's hard to let it go, it just doesn't suit me anymore. Some of the reasons are minor, but the deal breaker is that I need a bike where I sit up straighter for the sake of both my neck and hips.

This bike and a different car were my first big purchases after college. This was after I moved away from my hometown, although I was still in Illinois. I had to get a different car, since my old, beater, college car was falling apart and I needed a car to get to work. The bike was purchased on a whim. A friend from work wanted company while she was purchasing a bike. Each year "the" bike shop in town held a big sale at the fairgrounds. A different friend worked for the bike shop and was working at the sale when I was there. I got bored waiting for my work friend. On a whim, I asked for help picking out a bike to try. I wasn't planning on buying it, but I sort of fell in love with it. It was a good price, since it was the prior year model, but it was also spendy enough that I decided to finance it. There was some sort of 90 days or 6 months same as cash deal. I figured why not, especially since it would also help me establish a credit rating. After I filled out the requisite paperwork for credit approval, I had to wait. so my friend took me over to look at bike helmets.

Today, bike helmets are ubiquitous and I feel naked without one. In the late 1980's, that was not the case. I looked at my friend and said "really!?!, I don't need a bike helmet". My friend told me that while he couldn't make me wear one, he was not going to sell me the bike or any bike unless I purchased one. I am thankful he insisted, since I have faithfully worn a helmet ever since I purchased that first one from him.

Sometime after picking out a bike helmet, but before the bike purchase was finished, my friend disappeared for several minutes. When he came back, he had a strange grin on his face. I asked him what was going on. He said that the credit guy had called him over and told him that my credit had checked out, it was really, really good, and he should try to sell me a more expensive bike.

It was a great bike and I'll bet I rode it at least several thousand miles. It would be interesting to know the actual mileage. Today was the last time and my trip was between 8 to 10 miles. My loop included going to a client site and my co-working site, along with doing several errands afterwards. While I was pleased and very happy to get all of this done via bike, it also helped me solidify my decision to buy a new one. I test drove several this past Sunday and I was surprised by how much more comfortable I could be. The funny part is that I always complained about the color of my bike. I was never thrilled about the brown color. Of course, I would prefer a bright, bold color like purple. The funny part is that the new bike I am looking at comes in white (ugh) or brown, so I will likely continue to own a brown bike.

I hadn't quite come to the decision to part with the old one or at least not to part with it until I had the replacement. However, my hubby is also looking at getting a new bike that will work better with the new hip. Throwing his leg up and over a bike with a bar on it is even less desirable for him than it is for me. We dropped off his bike before dinner. The guy at the bike shop was helpful and very nice and the price the guy recommended as a sales price was higher than I expected. We asked about the difference between bringing a bike in for a trade-in versus trying to sell it through the used bike sale. It made a lot more sense to do the used bike sale. After dinner, I decided it was time to let go. The same guy at the bike shop evaluated my bike and he recommended a price. He also said that I could probably go higher. I elected not to. I want it to sell and I think it will. I want it to be a decent deal for someone else and I hope they enjoy this bike as much as I have.

It's funny and kind of weird to be so sentimental about an object, but I also don't have that many objects which I have owned, used, and enjoyed for 30 years.   

Oh yes, this is supposed to be a blog about art, drawing and painting. After a long hiatus, I picked up a pen a started drawing yesterday. Today, I tried several quick outlines / drawings of cats. They would not stay still, so I could not go into detail. Here are two that I like.